So you guys voted for Bullying this week. Now I am going to talk about a lot of things and some of these do include self-harm, suicide and other things that may have a trigger warning for some people so I do understand if you do not continue reading this post.
There is no definitive definition of bullying but Gov.uk says this:
“However, it’s usually defined as behaviour that is:
- intended to hurt someone either physically or emotionally
- often aimed at certain groups, for example, because of race, religion, gender or sexual orientation
It takes many forms and can include:
- physical assault
- making threats
- name calling
It has been around for so long that it can take many forms and sometimes we don’t realise or see that it is happening around us.
Being big all my life, you can imagine the things I have had said to me. I didn’t know it was bullying, I thought it was just name-calling and they would get tired of it but as I grew older, I noticed that certain people kept doing it and they weren’t getting tired of it. They wanted to make me feel sad. The worst thing is that telling a teacher meant you got a lot of backlash from that person and their friends.
I know most schools have an anti-bullying policy but I personally feel some don’t really stick to it. They dismiss the name-calling as that and nothing is done about it. I once had to run away from someone when I was around 8 or 9 because they said and I can still remember it to this day “you can call your dad on my phone, come walk with us” and when I got close, I heard her whisper something and then she and her friends started to run at me. It was the most scared I had been all my life. Teachers didn’t believe me, the person and her friends all denied it and I was branded a snitch.
When will schools learn that all of this is going on and disband it? I am not saying that all schools don’t apply their policy but some of the schools I have been to, they did not care. They would say “they’re just jealous” or “they’re just joking don’t worry”. How does that affect someone so young? How does it shape them for later life?
I went to my secondary school for 7 years. I got bullied, I didn’t report it and what I did report wasn’t enough to make me feel like I could be normal again. Here’s the reason why. My head told me to not to. My head thought: “Don’t do it. It’s not worth it. They’re just messing around like everyone has said the past couple of years. Just keep it inside, you don’t want to tell on them and then you get it worse. You never want it worse”. Little did I know that the little voice who said that in the back of my brain was growing and soon, a few years later and a whole ordeal of other things that the little voice attended, it would become two people. Anxiety and depression. I was anxious because I didn’t want to tell anyone of a higher authority but at the same time, what they were saying made me feel so low and disgusted with myself. I was in a dilemma and this is how it’s affected me. (Bullying was not the main cause of my mental health but it did not help me)
Why do people think it’s okay to bully someone? What do they think about when they do it? Do they feel accomplished? relief? unhappy? Do they know how it can affect people? There is one story that sticks in mind when thinking about this. I remember reading about it and I burst into tears. Someone hung themselves because they were being bullied at school and out of school by the same people. It has happened to so many people but it keeps happening.
I don’t know why people still think its okay to call someone a rude word. It hurts me to see when people are bullied because I use to be there. No one deserves to be in that position. It is horrible to just sit there and be called names, even online. It isn’t even addressed properly in the news because it isn’t serious until someone dies. It is the truth. I respect so many schools who eradicate bullying because no one deserves to be treated like that.
Everyone is struggling in their own way and people who bully others don’t seem to understand that. If any of you didn’t know, I lost my mum to cancer when I was 15. It was then where my mental health slid. At that time, I joined groups on Facebook with people my age to gain something normal back but to also isolate myself from the real world. I didn’t want to deal with the fact that people were looking at me because they knew my mum had died. One specific group on Facebook found out about my mum and certain people decided to bully me and say horrible things about my mum.
Social media is such a vast collection of photos, statuses and videos where anyone can be targeted but no one seems to do anything about. We dismiss it because “they’re jealous” and “they’re online, they can’t do any physical damage”. This is false. I felt way down that deep hole because of what people ONLINE were saying about my mum.
Bullying can hurt anyone in many forms and it is so sad to see groups like LGBT+ who are targeted the most. They are still human beings, let them live their best life. Just because they are unique in their own way does not mean people get to call them horrible names and make them feel like they don’t belong in this world. Even if you aren’t part of the LGBT+ community, you shouldn’t be made to feel like you don’t fit in.
Now this bit is for you, the one who calls the girl in your English class a pig, the one who jokes about someone looking different to you, the one who discriminates against anyone who doesn’t fit your perception of a human being, please just think about how you make people feel. That girl in your English class may have an eating disorder but you would never know because she keeps it to herself but you continue to bully her. That guy who has anxiety and has to do their presentation after the class because otherwise, they would have a panic attack in front of the whole class who you call a wimp and talk about behind his back.
No matter what, people around you are different whether that be race, sexuality, gender, size or mental health. Why bully someone just because they are different? There isn’t an answer because it shouldn’t be a question.